I walked in a circle

Walked in a circle for 3h

My living situation is depressing me

But like i told everything to my therapist, and they also did not know what to say~

I have troubleshooted everything possible out, i just seem to have bad luck for some reason ~

Like i am massively succeeding, while at the same time massively failing

He did not have any answer, we just kinda joked about it

Bc like what else

If there were anything feasible, i would already be going it~

I have made diagrams and lists etc,

Like i just feel lost

Like i cant be happy or enjoy my successes bc they are contrasted by my equal failues, it seems outside of my control

Btw they send me to get full bottom surgery and gave me a list of docs

Like most trans girls would be extatic

And i dont feel a thing but feeling trapped and hopeless since weeks

If not months

I am awake for 24+ hours

But i speak honest still

There is no hell comparable to the feeling of falling so short of my own expectations by something seemingly out of my control







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