Like

Its actually beeing arround ppl my age in the tides of life and getting a scale for my existence by comparison

And beeing able to read what problems ppl my age have, so i can go solve them

Like its not a trivial thing,

Now i still have to go back to the place, where i need to even request assistance to get there bc the infrastructure is not there

Like the rest of the world is a net of connection

It just makes me sader and sader, that i am wasting my life like that

But also there is no job to pay my bills it seems ~